The Rough Draft

12/18/2009

Hand / Eye coordination

Filed under: — Steve Abbott @ 3:36 pm

So my son Colin as previously stated has Autism. In fact he’s classified as extremely Autistic. Unlike Jenny McCarthy, we get that this is who he is, there is no cure and you just do the best you can and be happy for what you get in return. This level of Autism presents a number of issues regarding communication and understanding between our family and my son. He’s mostly non verbal in that he communicates in single words as opposed to sentences, the most we’ll get out of him is three words strung together. Anything longer will be movie dialogue. Dialogue, I might add he’ll repeat at length. Of course his diction can get a bit muddled so sometimes it’ll take us a few months to figure out what film it’s from. We get by and for the most part can figure out what he wants, though he gets a lot more specific when it comes to certain DVD’s, Musical shows and Video games (more on that in a bit)

Link to article

12/16/2009

Hope… Still not a plan

Filed under: — Steve Abbott @ 3:34 pm

So thanks to IMDb and a few other sites I get about ten queries a week regarding the kind of scripts I have no interest in either reading, critiquing or generally knowing about the existence of. See IMDB has one major flaw, it shows what you’re doing and what you’ve done but it doesn’t allow you to list a webpage unless you pony up even more cash.

Link to article

12/12/2009

Fifteen minutes? Not these days…

Filed under: — Steve Abbott @ 3:32 pm

Remember when the news used to have… well, news? You know, a compendium of information about stuff that was happening in the world. Cause to be honest, I’m not all that interested in who Tiger did or didn’t shag (married or not). In fact I wasn’t all that interested in him in respects to golf, well anything to do with the game either. Perhaps if he’d portrayed himself as more of a guy and less of a Paragon (is the counter to Paragon Pariah?) there’d be less fall out? You know, if he was the Wilt Chamberlain of Golf, would people just cluck their tongues and go, “Oh that Tiger…”

Link to article

12/5/2009

Last Ride of the Year

Filed under: — Steve Abbott @ 3:30 pm

So tomorrow will probably be my last ride of the year. It’s still dry but the snow is really close and with snow comes the salt. So I’ll be attending the club meeting tomorrow morning and then going off to find a decent wand type car wash. A bit of Stabil in the tank and that’ll be another year of riding done.

Link to the article

A Night at the Museum

Filed under: — Steve Abbott @ 3:27 pm

So Colin, my autistic son, loves these movies. We as parents don’t force our movie tastes on him, he’s come by them himself honestly. he’s also a big fan of James Bond and yes, he prefers Sean Connery, though he was enthusiastic about Casino Royal.

On my trip down to Virginia this Spring, my friend Michael took me up to DC for the Sunday and we toured a number of the Smithsonian Museums. For me the Air and Space Museum was the best, I’ll be heading down next year to catch the static displays out at the Dulles portion of the museum. However, I happened to arrive a day after the premiere at the museum and so I was able to get Colin a T-Shirt of the film. Which he proudly wore when we caught it a few weeks later.

Link to the article

12/1/2009

Getting a Film made…

Filed under: — Steve Abbott @ 3:25 pm

…Is not always the best thing that can happen to you. Success depends on a large number of factors, most of which are completely out of your control. Now I’m not one of those guys who’s super precious about my words. It’s a little irritating if you don’t follow my script but more in a, “I put a lot of thought into that,” sort of way. Believe it or not, it’s an intricate process. Some of these lines, I write now, will pay off later. Of course, because you shoot a film in bits and pieces, it’s not readily apparent on the day. Never mind that you’re supposed to have read the whole thing cover to cover a few times.

Link to the Article

11/27/2009

Heavy Lifting

Filed under: — Steve Abbott @ 3:22 pm

It ain’t for everybody.

There are times I’m glad for my twenty plus years in the blue collar trades. For one it means my family will never go hungry because I’ve always got a fallback position to go to. The other thing my trade gave me is that sometimes, you’ve just got to bear down get through the task at hand. No matter how much you’re sweating or how much it hurts.

There isn’t always a slick technological solution at hand.

Link to the article

11/24/2009

The mishmash and happiness might be…

Filed under: — Steve Abbott @ 3:17 pm

…The marker you bought before the new one and cheaper too.

So I went out and played some Paintball again last night. That makes for three Mondays in a row. A bit of a record for this year. I was hoping to offload my Automag but the guy I talked to didn’t have the cash… No worries, I can wait and it isn’t going anywhere. I was able to get another Select Fire Trilogy for one of the other players. I got a smoking deal on Ebay and because he works for one of the major Paintball Manufacturers I’ll be taking a few cases of paint in trade. Which works out for everybody. He gets a good marker and I get a ton of paint.

Link to the article

11/21/2009

A Critique on Critics

Filed under: — Steve Abbott @ 3:15 pm

I went and saw Pirate Radio tonight. The critics are giving the film mixed reviews. Of course I only got to see the two hour nine minute American release apparently the European release is another twenty minutes longer. On of the critiques I read stated that Richard Curtis had been right to cut the twenty minutes because it was still too long a film in his opinion.

Well mate, opinions are like assholes, everybody’s got one.

Link to article

11/16/2009

Happiness is a new gun part 2

Filed under: — Steve Abbott @ 3:13 pm

So the new marker arrived today. It required a bit more assembly than most of my other Paintball guns. Not that that’s a bad thing. We all have our little rituals related to our markers. I’m all about the proper amount of lubrication on the bolt, that sort of thing.

Link to the article

11/15/2009

Filtering the BS

Filed under: — Steve Abbott @ 9:49 am

One of the hardest things to figure in film is when you are on the receiving end of a large amount of bullshit. Which can be tough as the industry as a whole is powered by bullshit, collusion and treachery. For the most part that’s fine, you know where you stand.

Link to the article

11/13/2009

Happiness is a new gun part one

Filed under: — Steve Abbott @ 9:47 am

Above is the new BT Delta Elite that I’ve just purchased. It comes stock with an E-Grip, Rip Clip and an Apex™ Barrel. It’s rock out 13 balls per second and the Apex barrel lets you literally shoot around things. There are many guns like it but this one is mine.

Link to the article

11/9/2009

If you want something done right…

Filed under: — Steve Abbott @ 9:43 am

…Don’t give it to the government.

I was four years old when we went to the Moon and like every kid I wanted to be an Astronaut. I’m forty four now, and next year the Shuttle goes offline and there isn’t another craft slated to replace it until 2020. I’ll be fifty four in 2020 and I’d like to know just what the fuck happened?

Kennedy gave America a mission.

Link to the article

11/6/2009

In it for the long haul

Filed under: — Steve Abbott @ 9:41 am

You know you’ve hit a certain age when you want to start the article with, “The trouble with kids today.” But then I realized thats really Andy Rooney’s territory and seeing as I’m not that ancient, I decided to let it go. Well that and the fact it’s really disingenuous to lump the scourge of, “Instant gratification,” on just the youth. We’re all guilty of wanting the quick buzz of no time in with maximum return.

Link to the article

11/3/2009

Into the Breach

Filed under: — Steve Abbott @ 9:37 am

So here’s the majority of the main cast working their way through the first read through of the script. This is always followed by a flurry of activity by the writer as small mistakes are made evident and larger ones become apparent. All in all, it went okay. I think the current cast are all great and will bring tons to the script. I’m looking forward to sitting in on some of the rehearsals and seeing what they do with the scenes once they’re off book.

Link to the article

Just Kidding

Filed under: — Steve Abbott @ 9:33 am

“Just Kidding,” is the sort of phrase dropped on you by somebody who really want’s you to consider the idea they’ve just put forward. In other words, what it really means is, “Heads up, this is going to be an issue.”

Link to the article

10/31/2009

The Rough Draft Alternate Site

Filed under: — Steve Abbott @ 2:17 pm

So once again I’m trying other blog options. I’m going to see about relocating to the Wordpress site proper. Here’s the link to see what you think. The added bonus is you can post comments.

10/30/2009

Outlining

Filed under: — Steve Abbott @ 9:20 pm

outline

So, I’m not a smart enough guy to wing it, when I write. I need clearly posted signposts along the story path or I wander off into the desert of the second act, never to be seen or heard of again. Oh I know, some smart arses can pull the whole cloth of story straight out of their ass and more power to them but it’s good to know your own limitations.

Of course this does lead me to always be on the look out for decent outlining programs. I’ve tried a bunch. Save the Cat was pretty good but in the end, the fit didn’t seem right for me. Right now I’m using Contour and it’s fixed and free enough to let me get through my first outline and set the bones of the story down. However these things aren’t cheap. I’ve just come across Truby’s Blockbuster and at $179 for the base program and another $500 for the genre add ons, I’m giving it a pass. It might be the next best thing since sliced bread but that’s a lot of cash to lay down for something that isn’t going to run some fancy machine tools.

Plus it’s a bit of a gimmick. I don’t like Contour because it points me in, “The right direction,” story wise. I like it because it breaks everything into two page blocks, which allows me to match my pacing. Plus the printed report looks good and reads fine. I think a lot of people buy these things thinking they’ll do the heavy lifting of creating a story and nothing can really be as far from the truth. I just need to see the layout of the story. Sometimes I’ll use file cards, sometimes it’s yellow legal pads. Every story is different. I’ve even tried Mind Mapping software (epic fail) to get the threads of the A, B, and C plots right. You just keep bashing away until it feels right. It may end up in your outlining software but chances are you did the heavy lifting elsewhere.

10/16/2009

Goodbye to all that

Filed under: — Steve Abbott @ 8:37 am

Graves
Robert Graves Second Btln, Welch Guards 1915,
second to left seated

So I’m reading, “Goodbye to all that,” by Robert Graves an autobiographical account of the authors life dealing a large part with, “The Great War.” As it is a book written at a specific time, you need to put it within the context of the day. Graves is of the ruling class and is a bit of a Prig. I had to set aside my lower class attitudes through the first few chapters to get to the meat of the book. Because even though I’ve lived in Canada most of my life. I remember being a child and living on the Laird’s land. Which is why I’m so glad the Fox hunt is no more. Anything that spoils the fun of the Toffs, I’m for.

But I digress. Graves carries us through in stark detail, life in the trenches, the ineffectiveness of the first gas masks, the ignorance of high command and the lack of understanding of the public back at home. As it is with most soldiers. There is the War and there is The World of home. We see the change of a young man (19 at the time of first service) doing his duty to an old man (22) wondering if the slaughter will ever end.

It’s a very powerful book, made all the more so because it’s not written by a historian and any external context has to be supplied by us the reader, with the years of history under us. Often those of us who study conflict are labelled, “War nuts.” I am not crazy for war. To be honest, anybody who has studied or participated in armed conflict would think twice about it as a means of resolution. I understand that there are times where you must fight. But it is no comfort to those giving life and limb if you cannot supply a just reason for why they fight.

While Graves by the end of his book is very much against the war in France and is deeply damaged psychologically, at no point does he shirk his duty. Which when you consider the level of horror he must have endured, is nothing short of astounding.

I highly recommend this book, if not for the history of it, for the humanity.

10/11/2009

Basking in the aftermath

Filed under: — Steve Abbott @ 9:34 am

cult of done

So this is where the act of writing is sort of like sex. A flurry of activity, followed by a sudden release and then..?

For me there’s usually a couple of days after a script is finished where I just can’t write. You just need to recharge the batteries a bit. Maybe it’s my subconsciousness bedding my brain in the dirt for the assault of the notes to follow. Unlike my last few films, this one is going to require me on set every day for the full pull. Which I’m not looking forward to because I’m not a big fan of being on set (though the spacecraft set might be a different story).

In other news though, there’s movement on yet another script, something I pitched a month or so ago and they want to proceed with it in next year. So if any of you guys know a really good Irish actor, give me a shout at the site’s email (just remember to remove the spamblock).

Fuck it, it’s a sunny day, I’m going for a ride, while I still can. Winter’s coming after all.

10/5/2009

Critical Thinking

Filed under: — Steve Abbott @ 2:55 pm

critic

I’m not a big fan of critics, well modern critics anyway, ah hell, let’s cut to the chase. I really can’t stand web based critics. See I live my writing life by a very simple rule. “If you’re not good enough to get paid for it, then fuck off.” This twat was forwarded onto one of my forums by the moderator (whom I respect). You can read the original article here.

Now everybody is entitled to their opinion and we’re all entitled to post it to the web. I know at least two people read this blog. However, you don’t get to cast stones with impunity. I checked this gentleman’s bio and it turns out he’s an attorney with a penchant for writing fiction. Okay. So here’s a guy offering his opinion on how film should be executed with no experience on what it takes to get a film to the big screen.

Nice work if you can get it. Oh right, he’s not being paid for it, which makes him a tosser.

Roger Ebert is my favorite critic. Not for what he reviews and writes about but for how he writes about them. Since he has lost the ability to talk, his prose has only improved. He also gets paid for his reviews and has written the script for an enduring cult classic. Notice I said enduring, not endearing.

I’m always aghast at how the writer takes a huge hit if the screenplay isn’t a success. Everybody is quick to jump on the, “It isn’t this, it isn’t that,” bandwagon. So the director and the actors get a walk? I’ve had many a page screwed by poor acting and directing, by lack of attention to the details on the page. How is it my fault that the scene was not executed properly? Why should I be the one to face the ire of the armchair critic.

What’s the agenda? Knock the writer off his lofty apple box? Bring him down a peg or two? Wow, you really nailed him vague internet failed writer guy. your words have opened a wound that will not heal.

What? you’re not paid for writing that? Did you see my rule?

Fuck off.

10/3/2009

The Sweet Smell of Desperation

Filed under: — Steve Abbott @ 11:00 am

No pic for this one.

So the treatment was well received. No notes, which is always a good thing, even the replaced writer (now one of the producers) couldn’t fault it even though I’m sure he wanted to (I mean hey, we’re all only human). Now the only concern (as far as the investor goes) is the first time Director. I’m not too worried about that.

So I’m just past the first act and homing in on the second act midpoint. The script is due next Friday. I’ve sent off the preliminary character breakdowns and sides, so we can start the casting process. Things are as they should be. The drama is being kept to a minimum. Of course, once we have the first production meeting, the drama may return with a vengeance.

But for now, all is quiet save for the clicking of my keyboard.

One of the scary trends I’ve been noticing lately is when people don’t know how to do something or they’re way out of their depth, they just keep pushing on until they literally sink out of sight. I don’t get it. Nobody knows everything. Why pretend you do? There are skilled people out there who possess the skill to fill that gap. Why not let them shine? It takes the heat off of you, the stuff you need doing gets done and you look like a champ instead of a buffoon. Is that the winning strategy?

People need to loosen up.

Life is hard, shit happens and sometimes it hurts. Asking for a helping hand every now and then does not make you look weak.

However, there are limits.

I understand that the internet is a hugely successful networking tool. Heck, I was there when Al Gore invented it (joking, joking). I also know that I’m on a bunch of indie film making web sites. Some, I even still go to. This does not however, allow, “You,” whomever you may be to contact me and beg for a donation to your indie short. If it’s not good enough to attract investors or it’s too expensive to produce with your own money (yes I know what they say but have any of them actually made a short?) then chances are it’s either not ready or it’s crap. I’d even have been more receptive if your call for funds was on a message board because then it’s not targeting me specifically and who knows, maybe there is a sugar daddy with money burning a hole in his pocket for you.

And there’s one more thing.

This whole, “Buy American,” thing is irritating. Protectionism at it’s worst. So in kind, we only support Canadian based ventures. Of course you could always make those missing funds the old fashioned way, you could earn them.

9/27/2009

Sniper

Filed under: — Steve Abbott @ 10:44 pm

headshot

BOOM!

So the game is on, the previous writer is being tasked to other duties on the feature and the gig is mine. We’ve got a pretty solid concept and by the end of the week we’ll have an even more solid treatment. Time is short, we’re maybe not in the eleventh hour here but its 10:15 and the clock is ticking. Just the sort of environment I like best.

No hard feelings from the other guy I hope, he took his shot, it just wasn’t going to go down. No man is an island. You want to make it in this industry, you need people on your team and you need to be a team player. The trick now is to get out of the goat fuck with everything intact.

The real secret is, it’s always a goat fuck. The trick is to always be the blue eyed boy and pull the wreckage out of the fire.

Which is what I do.

Pull the trigger, feel the rush.

9/23/2009

Heroin would be easier…

Filed under: — Steve Abbott @ 10:19 pm

heroin

Some days…

So I have spent the better part of the last five days trying to help a producer to bring his current writer around in regards to the script he continues to dig away at (as in digging his own grave). I’ll hand it to the guy, he just keeps plugging ahead. Won’t listen to a word from anybody. And I thought I had an ego? The trouble is, it’s going to get him labelled as, “Difficult,” and once that millstone is around your neck, it’s impossible to get it off and down you will go.

I spent about three hours on the phone today alone trying to find a work around for this guy. No such luck.

And then I got one of those special emails from some fool looking to sell me his script. He sends me the one page and the fact that it’s based around a piece of classical music. Which is fine I guess, I often write to classical, I’ve certainly got my favorites and most tell a tale. However, it clearly states that Sabot Productions is not looking at queries (in big bold letters) on our front page and that we do thrillers, horror and a bit of reality TV. We clearly don’t do classical music inspired drama.

Ever.

Never ever.

Which is why, if I don’t know you or know and like somebody you know who referred you, we won’t be reading you.

Ever.

And just so we’re clear.

Never ever.

And by never, what I really mean is, “Fuck off away home.”

Because it’s obvious to me, that if you aren’t motivated enough to actually research the company you’re sending your query to, then the chances are, you are also a lazy writer. Which means, you won’t understand the conventions of genre, you won’t know to avoid cliche’ and your dialogue will read like the pancake breakfast at Denny’s, flat as fuck.

Thanks but I’m already reading enough shitty writing right now but at least I’m getting paid for that.

9/19/2009

I call Bullshit

Filed under: — Steve Abbott @ 1:10 pm

maytagrepairman

So a few months ago our washing machine died and nothing I did fixed it, including replacement of the timing circuit. We’d bought both units (the washer and the dryer) from Sears and while they’d served us well, we’d never been totally happy with them. They did an okay job but it really was just okay. So out shopping we went. Store after store and the prices weren’t great, the service even less so. It turned out that Maytag was having a sale, up we went and a new washer and dryer set were purchased. We decided at that time not to get the risers but we did pay to have our old units taken away and the new units leveled. I wasn’t at home when we took delivery and I can’t say that the crew who did the install actually leveled the two machines. Making something not rock is not leveling them.

A few months go by and I’m on the return leg of my Maritimes trip. My wife calls me, our fridge has died. Lucky for us we have a freezer as well. The frozen stuff goes into it and we just chuck the rest. I literally get home, get all of the travel gear off the bike and go up to Maytag. An hour later and my wallet severely depleted (one fridge = one washer + one dryer) I return home. I’d also ordered the riser units for the Washer and Dryer. The idea being that the crew of two could install them at the same time they were dropping off our fridge.

Thus began the saga.

The day of delivery, my risers were back ordered. No worries, I wasn’t going to get nailed for a separate delivery charge, those could wait. But the waiting was going to be on my head because their delivery truck was in for service and the replacement truck broke down. No worries, I’d take delivery the next day, first thing in the morning. I’d plumbed in the water connection for the new fridge and rearranged my kitchen to suit. The fridge arrived and it was this story and that story in regards to the previous day. these guys weren’t happy campers. I wrote it off, we all have rough days.

The following Wednesday my risers show up. What followed was a song and dance about how they hadn’t been told they were there to instal them as well, that it took hours per unit. how it had to be this way or that way. Blah, blah, blah, wah, wah, wah. I told the guy I’m pretty sure I could figure it out, signed the paperwork and sent him on his way. Oh, they wanted to charge me a hundred per unit to mount them.

Nice.

Trouble is I’m not your usual punter. I’ve designed automation and built equipment from scratch. So I’m not intimidated by too much mechanically and bottom line here, we were talking about four machine screws. So I started with the dryer. I moved out the unit and set the riser in place. I then leveled it using a level (it pays to use the right tools). I then removed the existing feet from the dryer, tipped the unit forward and hoisted it onto the base by myself. the rest was just a matter of aligning the four pretapped holes on the bottom of the dryer with the ones on the riser. So that took about ten minutes. One down one to go.

I repeated the same thing with the washer. However the washer has the added problem of water weight. And I had the problem that it’s a small room, there is only one of me and if I wait for my wife, she’s not strong enough to help either. I do watch a lot of discovery channel though. I grabbed some Bamboo flooring scraps and laid them up against the riser top. I then put the washer at an angle on the boards, got my shoulder behind them and pushed up. The washer slid up the planks and onto the top of the riser. I pulled the wood out, aligned the four holes and screwed her down. Both units took me just under an hour each.

And it didn’t cost me anymore money. You see, most design guys don’t want things to be too difficult. From what the guy on the truck had said, they were installing the risers incorrectly and more to the point inefficiently because they couldn’t see that the engineers wanted the units placed at step three not step six.

So my advice is unless it’s totally beyond you, have a go yourself. It won’t cost you any more.

9/18/2009

A firm grasp of Cliche’

Filed under: — Steve Abbott @ 8:41 am

nuts

Well a death grip really. Let me explain.

Sometimes, when we’re stuck on something. We’ll steal from a scene that works. We then call this, “Homage,” to cover our tracks. Everybody is guilty of this from time to time. Sometimes it is true homage, other times it’s because the shot is so iconic, that we’ve forgotten it’s been done before but the majority of the time it’s because of sheer laziness.

We all get tired, the trick is to not let it show in your work. If you’re going to steal, don’t get caught doing it.

So here’s some simple rules:

Time is on your side - If you want to rip off an iconic shot, it shouldn’t be from a film that’s just left the theaters or one that is just coming out on pay per view. You’ll get caught and you’ll look like a hack. You can scream Homage to the high heavens but nobody will believe you. Why should they? You’re not motivated enough to be original? True homage is woven into the fabric of the piece in subtle bits and pieces, not as whole bolts of torn fabric.

If it didn’t work then, it’s not going to work now - If you are going to cheat a scene, make sure it’s one that works. Nobody want’s to be served yesterdays dog turds. As an adjunct, what might have worked then, may not work now, so be aware.

Lock your context - Make sure you get the context of the scene you’re going to steal from. Attitudes change as does language. The 70’s may not work so well in the new millenium.

It’s got to make sense - Don’t just string a bunch of cool scenes together and expect them to form a good story. Unless you’re a true genius, it simply isn’t going to work.

Don’t combine really big things if they don’t relate - A MacGuffin is typically a small object that can do great harm or good to whoever wants it the most. Be aware of economies of scale. They have to go together. A plague and a Vampire, if they’re related sure. The same goes for Zombies and most other supernatural creatures. If they’re not linked in the storyline, why bother? They subtract from each other, they don’t add up. What you get in the end is a story that doesn’t know what it is.

Which is death at the box office.

Avoid cliche’ - Jesus wept. The number of cliche’ ridden scripts I gone through recently. It just makes me really sad. If it’s cliche’ it has no originality so why is it in your script? The only way you can do it is if it is in the vein of parody or irony. Irony is very tricky. Make sure you know what you’re doing before you commit.

Bottom line - Be original.

If not for me, for yourself and all the other poor readers out there.

9/12/2009

My New Hero

Filed under: — Steve Abbott @ 1:17 pm

hero

Read the article here.

9/11/2009

Jedi Mind Trick

Filed under: — Steve Abbott @ 10:22 am

jmt

“That’s not the path this story should take.”

So this should be an interesting article to say the least. I’m up for a Story Editing gig. Nothing new about that. I had a chat with the producer last night about a few things, the location available, the probable budget, the lack of prep time and finally the script or script idea in question. Which is where I of course come in. Now for those of you who know me, it’s no shocker that I can come on a bit strong. It has in the past gotten me in trouble as I’m a big guy and some people (smaller guys) find this intimidating. Not that I use my size to scare you (unless you owe me money or a fucking with me or being an idiot - okay, maybe I do use my size to scare you). But by coming on strong, for the most part, I’ll beat you down with what lives between my ears and that people is a lot of stuff and what I don’t know I will research until I do know.

So the possible story in question sounds? Well let’s just say, the pitch doesn’t sell in the room. Which is par for the course with the writer in question, we can’t all be champs at everything. Meh, same old same old. Me? I’m very strong on story and I’m aware enough to be able to write to a deadline (a very short deadline) where the concern is here is my somewhat strong personality.

Yes, I can be an asshole. Why? Life is too short for me to wait for you to grow up. Why there is a problem isn’t important to me, how we’re going to fix it is. How the fix will effect the rest of the script is also foremost in my mind. Words are not precious, there’s plenty of them out there. The real skill is putting them together in a meaningful order, again and again and again.

So the bulk of the conversation last night was, “Go easy on this guy.”

“No worries,” I replied. You see the writer in question will also be the director of this project. They could hire me on to bash something out quick and dirty and that would be fine but this particular individual wants the hyphenate so my primary goal is to make sure he can fulfill his potential in that regard. It is not to force my will on the script yet to be written.

Now I don’t know if I’ve ever covered the three phrases. I could search the blog but I’m just too lazy. So I’ll go ever them and their power again. These are the words that can:

Get you laid.

Get you read.

Get you sold.

And most importantly make you not look like an asshole.

They play on the most basic premise of the human spirit. We are the heroes of our own story.

Phrase 1) Really? I hadn’t thought of it that way.

This makes you look like you have been thinking like this but you value your new friend’s opinion.

Phrase 2) How interesting, tell me more.

No, I really value your opinion, because I’m totally at a loss here.

Phrase 3) I’m not sure. What do you think.

See, you’re so smart.

All three are ego enforcing. The trick is to listen. If you do have an opinion, don’t trot it out there if its inflammatory. You piss off the mark and there’s no chance to use any of the phrases. So the trick is to get the conversation started and just keep rolling out the phrases in the order required. Switch them up so you don’t seem like a parrot and the world will be your oyster.

Now when I’m story editing, I also use phrases because really, you need the writer to solve his own problems. It ultimately has to be his idea or it won’t feel right and you’ll end up with a blocked writer, who will be crankier than a Wolverine in a sleeping bag. This is not a trick. You just need to keep asking the right questions until they figure it out.

Does that serve the story / character / budget?

How does that effect (insert Act or plot point number here).

That sort of thing. Be prepared to back up statements with facts that can be verified. It adds comfort to the Writer.

That sort of thing. It’s only when they won’t budge that you use the Jedi mind trick. How do you do that?

The answer here, you will not find.

9/8/2009

Pitching Poo

Filed under: — Steve Abbott @ 7:52 am

pitch

The industry parlance for a screenplay is, “This piece of shit.” If you don’t immediately now understand where the writer fits in to film hegemony, well you’re an idiot. Not to worry, the industry is full of idiots, you’ll fit right in.

I see a lot of these Pitch Fests cropping up these days. The idea being that you come in and pay a fee and a sort of idea job market is set up, where interested parties are brought in and you get to go from pillar to post at ten minutes a shot, trying to entice them with your pitch and package to take you on as their next greatest show (or film). The average price is around $200 for the access. Which ain’t cheap but it does give the average joe a shot right?

I’m not so sure. I’ve yet to find any evidence of anybody getting something in the works from one of these venues. Even their testimonials are vague. See if there was a show picked up and developed you could bet that there’d be a lot of type expended on the promotional material about how these guys went from zero to hero but so far… nada. Now it could be that there’s no follow up to see if things are put in motion but its been my experience that any success ends up being like a, “Who is the Daddy moment,” on Jerry Springer. I could be wrong but I’m not about to spend my money to find out.

I’m still Scottish.

I’m not a super big fan of pitching. I can do it but I prefer the long form as opposed to the sound bite. Breaking a screenplay down into a single sentence is an effort in futility as far as I’m concerned. I also like props (albeit small ones). I’ve never paid to pitch, and usually (at least for me) what you are really selling is you, not the script or scripts you walked in with. Sure they might buy your script but chances are they’re more interested in what you bring to the table as a writer and then you find they’re pitching you on a script they’d like to pursue or they’re asking about you doing a rewrite on a script they’ve got that isn’t working.

The point here, is you aren’t paying anybody anything. If the money doesn’t flow in one direction (towards you), you’re being taken advantage of and your dream is just that much further out of reach.

You really want to pitch? Attend festivals, meet directors, other writers, actors. Pitch them (though never at social functions). Be entertaining, be polite, be attentive. They will read you for free and these are people who you need as allies as you steer your script through the muddy waters. Are the festivals more expensive? They can be but the contacts you make will come by honestly.

You can whore yourself out later.


9/5/2009

Another one bites the dust… For now.

Filed under: — Steve Abbott @ 3:57 pm

So another script is finished off. I sort of had to because I had been in one of those situations where the question literally was, “What else have you got?” Because everything I have is pretty much in play right now, I had to tap into the stuff that was not quite ready yet. Which I don’t really like to do but when they’re waving money under your nose… I mean I’m human, right?

So that leaves me with one other script at about the halfway mark and one in treatment form and a couple of others ready to be outlined but still very much on the compost pile. Oh and a thirteen part reality series to budget but that’s a whole other hat to wear.

As a writer, you have to always have multiple projects on the go. You don’t know when they’re going to come off or even in what order that might be but you can be sure, “What else have you got?” Is not a question you’re only going to hear once.

Too many times, I hear from writers just starting out, “I’ve finished a script, now what?” I usually tell them to chuck it in a drawer and start another one. Then when that one’s done go back and read it again. You’ll have a fresher take for the rewrite. Well the three or four rewrites. Because that’s what you’re going to need to do before it’s ready to show anybody. And if they like it, you’ll get notes and you know what that means, more rewrites.

Which brings me to some of the posts I’ve been reading about writing as of late. Which most are in the vein of, “I want to write a screenplay, how do I start.” Which flabbergasts me a bit. I mean there’s a multi million dollar industry built around showing people how to write screenplays. There’s seminars, books, lecture tours, festivals, just Google screenwriting and stand back. I’m not even covering the huge number of legitimate (not that these other things aren’t legit (well most of them anyway)) film schools and writing programs that are world wide. That the question has to be asked tells me how monumentally lazy these people are that they can’t do a simple search and find all of this for themselves.

When I wanted to become a screenwriter, there were steps that I took. My friend Michael had been trying to get me to come to the dark side for a few years but at that time, I was convinced I was a novelist. I’d had some minor inroads into the publishing world but after a particularly bad meeting with a senior editor at Doubleday Dell, my days in the book world were pretty much at an end. Screenwriting was the new path.

Now I’d done two novels, so three act structure and all that were well ingrained what I didn’t understand was how a screenplay was developed, how it was assembled into a final product. So rather than pester people with my questions, I enrolled in the Script Development Course at the Vancouver Film School. Where Alan DiFiore (The Handler, DaVinci’s Inquest) kicked the shit out of my writing for sixteen weeks. And my eternal thanks to him for it. Because when I left, I understood, what made a script work and how to write tight. In other words, rather than ask for the general opinion of others, I took a course with a working writer showing me the ropes. Then I wrote a few shorts and had them made (while still writing features on spec) and I built a body of work. Which is what real writers do, they build a body of work. So that when the question.

“What Else do you have?” Arises.

You have something to show them.

9/1/2009

Thank you Jesus!

Filed under: — Steve Abbott @ 8:01 pm

Buddy Christ

Well not really…

I mean I could really use a good sports analogy here about fumbling footballs and stuff but the reality is that the writing life as far as film is concerned is more like a street brawl. You see an opening, you get the knife in and watch the guy drop not knowing what just happened or why he’s now leaking all over the street.

Pretty hyperbolic right?

But you get the point and so does the guy bleeding out. Or maybe he didn’t, maybe he never did.

A staple of the gun fighter movies is the younger faster kid looking to make a name for himself by taking on the old experienced killer. In the movies it played out in many ways. Some old gun fighters eager to get out of the game, staged their own death with the help of the kid. In others, the kid was better and they died where they stood. Some went for the real world approach and the kid would be blown out of their socks but the gun fighter always knew, there’d be another kid to take his place in a heartbeat or a day or a month or a year until he made the mistake.

There’s one type of film I don’t go near. The family comedy, well most comedy. I mean it’s not that I’m not a funny guy, it’s just that my humor is dry and sometimes it’s black and the House of Mouse ain’t too keen on harshing their mellow. I get the FC genre conventions but I’m more interested in a dark family drama or thriller than Saccharin pap.

Still, I read a lot of scripts, sometimes by experienced writers set in genres they have no business playing in. Some of these have real weight behind them (and by weight I mean money to get them made) but they don’t work and so they end up on my desk. And this is where the knife is drawn from its sheath. You see I get them because they need fixing and that’s what I do. I fix the broken and make them work again. Most times, it’s with all new parts, hell every time. I’ve done more page one rewrites than I can shake a stick at.

This latest one however, it just irritated me. Could I fix it? Sure. Did I want to? Not really. So I sent an email saying essentially that the investor would do better to take his money and burn it than invest in this script and then I made some other noises about putting best feet forward etc. I fired it off and promptly purged it from my brain.

A few hours later, I got a call about the script. The investor was not impressed with the script either. Did I have anything with action and minimal locations. I saw my opening in the crowd and slipped the blade in. The other writer dropped bleeding to the ground, without a sound.

“Sure do.” I said. “It’s almost finished. It’s real rough but I’ll send you what I’ve got.”

We’re signing the contract next week.

Oh sure, there’ll be more kids looking to make a name but I’ll keep blowing them out of their socks until they stop coming .

8/21/2009

Maritimes Trip Diary Aug 19th to 21st

Filed under: — Steve Abbott @ 8:05 pm

Lunenberg

So a bit bummed from Halifax, I went off to Lunenberg. Which was pretty and very much a working town as far as the Sea goes. I should have ditched Halifax and come here but the Bluenose II was out and to be honest after Halifax I was itching to get on the return leg. So after a nice BLT sub, I threw the leg over the bike and took off for Parrsboro and the Fundy Geological Museum. Which I’d heard was good.

Well it was a pretty long haul just over 350kms from Lunenberg and it took me the better part of four hours to get there. Which was bad enough but it also turned out that this part of Nova Scotia wasn’t covered by Rogers. Not that big a deal, I still had my GPS (even though it had been having a continuous number of issues). Turns out the glorious town of Parrsboro is not included in the Map database. Oh the streets were there but it would appear I had hit that mythical place that U2 sings of because they had no names. No prob. I’d find this fucking Museum by hook or by crook and after a bit of sign following and guess work, I did find it. It was also free! Bonus.

fundygeomuseum

I hate to say it but you get what you pay for… at least in Canada. Sure it’s a pretty good representation of the prehistoric flora and some fauna. It’s just so poorly lit in the display cases that you’re not too sure what you’re looking at. To top it off, there’s a huge presentation of the Fundy Agate but you can’t find one to save your life in their gift shop. It was underwhelming to say the least.

It was also pretty much the last straw. I’d had enough. Cape Breton had been great, the rest of Nova Scotia, while beautiful not so much. I legged it back up the road and crashed at a motel just outside Sackville. The next day was a long one and Nova Scotia turned into New Brunswick which turned into Quebec which turned into Ontario. I was going to push all the way home but it was the night of the big storm and my wife told me to hole up until morning. So I crashed at the Monte Carlo Inn in Cornwall. Cheap digs but they were clean and they were big believers in central air conditioning.

I was up at seven the next day. We’d been spared the fury that hit the GTA so the bike just needed a quick wipe down. I was on the road by 7:30am and booking for home. I ended up being glad that I’d stopped because after a certain time, the 401 just becomes a sea of big rigs and gets to be pretty tiring deeking around those guys constantly. So with a hint of grey sky and my rain gear on I bore in on my own bed. A couple of rain showers later and off came the rain gear and I was down to jeans and mesh. I rolled into the complex around 2pm. Total Kms 6252.

8/18/2009

Maritimes Trip Diary Aug 18th/09

Filed under: — Steve Abbott @ 8:05 pm

So Halifax turned out to be a bit of a bust. Oh not that it’s not colorful or full of interesting old buildings and it’s even got it’s fair share of museums. The problem is money, everybody has their hand out. I understand, it’s tough times all over and those tourist dollars matter but I’ve got to tell you, when I was in Washington, DC walking up and down the Mall everything was free. Free, and we’re talking huge world class museums of natural history, science, art, space and technology. The Americans might not be so hot on universal health care but they understand that their culture, their heritage should be free for all to see (except their national parks, those you pay for). For me to see all I wanted to see in Halifax, it would have cost me over a hundred dollars and that was a bit beyond the pale and a bit beyond my budget.

So I rode down to the park and visited a couple of the old batteries there.


By the mid afternoon, the heat had gotten to me and I nipped back to the hotel. Tomorrow Parrsboro about three hundred and fifty kms away.

8/17/2009

Maritimes Trip Diary Aug 16th & 17th/09

Filed under: — Steve Abbott @ 6:08 am

For some reason, I didn’t do an entry for yesterday. Probably because the day ran a bit long and fuel became a bigger issue than having fun. So much so, that I had to go all the way around the tip of Cape Breton and down a bit before I found a working gas station. Though it should be noted that the station I though was abandoned when I rode past it at 6pm was open for business, the next morning at 7am when I thought I’d risk it and have another go at getting to Meat Cove (it still looked like a bomb had gone off inside it though).

So as I write this, I’ve finished off the Cabot trail and have ended my day in a Motel in Sydney.


As far as the road to and down to Meat Cove goes, it starts out pretty simple and just get downright gnarly on the steep grade all the way down to the cove. Of course, once you’re down there, if you ain’t paying, you ain’t staying.


As yesterday was all about the ride, I figured, “Fine by me,” snapped a few pics and got back on the track up the mountain and back on the Trail.







As a side note, I’ve got to say that for long days in the saddle, the Icon Recon pants are crap. What idiot puts a heavy seam right under the riders thighs? Oh I know, somebody who has never seen a bike or sat on one for long periods (if at all). So hey Icon, how about a little form following function instead of fashion creating an inferior end result.

So as mentioned, today ended in a motel just past Sydney. Later that night, I caught District 9 at the local Cinema 10. It’s a funny little film in that it’s South African and for the US Marketing guys, it would seem a bit elusive. As hard SF (and it’s as hard as it gets) it’s damned good.

Today’s ride got off to a bit of a rocky start. It was raining when I woke up which means all the gear goes on including the wet weather gloves. The rain soon let up and now you’re riding in that vehicle generated mist. As things started to dry up, I cracked my visor and took a wasp at 80 kph to the left temple and yes, the little bastard’s last act was to give me a bit of a sting. Not the full sting cause to be honest, I think we both were taken by surprise. Lucky for me (I guess) my body breaks down the proteins of the venom pretty quickly so in just a couple of hours, there was little to show for the collision but a small red dot on the side of my temple.


After that, the day can only get better right? It did, the clouds burned off and the Sun came out and of course you start the long striptease of shedding gear. I took the #7 Marine Drive route which was nice and scenic, if not a bit windy. Windy enough to drop my bike’s fuel efficiency by about 30 km. So now I’m in Halifax and I’m going to spend tomorrow looking about.

8/15/2009

Maritimes Trip Diary Aug 15th/09

Filed under: — Steve Abbott @ 12:27 pm

Well the die was pretty much cast for PEI today and I decided enough was enough and legged it for the Woods Island Ferry to Nova Scotia. I guess the end result will be no PEI segment for the show. The good thing about being on a bike is you go right to the front of the line, on most Ferries.



An hour and a half later, I was in Nova Scotia.

And another hour and a half after that I was on the Cabot Trail! Yes, it is all that and a bag of chips!


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8/14/2009

Maritimes Trip Diary Aug. 14th/09

Filed under: — Steve Abbott @ 12:01 pm

P.E.I.

Well PEI is not failing to disappoint. The signage here is terrible. There are signs depicting a scenic spot or whatever but nothing after saying or showing what or where it might be. In fact, the seem to constantly steer you away from seeing stuff. Plenty of riding today but when your day’s high point is a really good Egg Salad sandwich at the Alberton Bakery and Cafe’. Well that pretty much says it all.


I did meet up with some other DL-650 riders and a few other riders too. On the way back to the Motel, I got to share the same airspace wit some American riders on Trikes. They were quizzing a local about our healthcare system. Sometimes you just kind of wish they knew the value of silence.

8/13/2009

Maritimes, Trip Diary Aug. 13th/09

Filed under: — Steve Abbott @ 11:51 am

So I’m in Mirimachi, Had a nice leisurely ride down Hwy 11. Finally stopped at a Timmies for a cuppa. I looked through the window at my front tire and thought to myself, “That doesn’t look right.” Turns out the roads of New Brunswick did have the last laugh on my poor front tire.

Lucky for me, I’d printed out a list of dealerships for Suziki all along or close to my trip route. JH Stewart Harley Davidson (Suzuki and Honda) was just ten minutes from where I was having a cup of tea. So here I sit in a bike dealership, as they mount an new front tire. The total cost of the tire and the installation was $200, so thanks for that guys, it could have been a lot worse..

I’ve already put 400 km on the new tire, so I think it’s broken in.

A note on GPS units. Depending on what you have, they have their plusses and minuses. Mine a fairly cheap Garmin Nuvi. I’ve taken to calling it HAL because it does seem to lose it’s mind from time to time. It’s sent me on three wild goose chases today. Not all of them Welcome. My next GPS is certainly going to have a multiple waypoint function.

I’m now in Summerside PEI. The bridge was cool and is a great feat of engineering. What I’ve seen of PEI so far isn’t very inspiring. Imagine a really big island and then turn all of it into a farm… a potato farm. This province is definitely a, “Have,” province, where New Brunswick was most definitely a, “Have not.” Of course, that’d be, “Have,” with really bad winters. Also I hope that the height of New Brunswick fashion is not Lycra shorts and a wife beater. I had to look really hard before I was able to figure out what was wrong with the picture.


8/12/2009

Maritimes, Trip Diary Aug. 12th/09

Filed under: — Steve Abbott @ 11:04 am

IMG_4517

Turned into a long day and probably an expensive one too. Started the day in dense fog, so much for drying my stuff out. Rode through that for about two hours. Always a fun thing to do on a Silver (fog camouflaged) motorcycle. Then many boring hours were spent rolling through Quebec. At least once the fog lifted I dried out again.

I finally made it to New Brunswick around 2pm. It came down to a choice, hold there or press on to Bathurst on the remote and twisty 385. I pressed on. New Brunswick for some reason is giving my GPS fits. Enough that I’ve started to call the unit HAL. It’s completely lost its way here to the the point where it sent me 3 km into the bush (I hit a locked gate or it would have continued to be game on).


So I got to ride on gravel not once but twice. The Pilot Roads held up but just. Two issues, the indicated as paved roads aren’t always and the gravel they use here is sharp not the pea crush I’m used to.


So 385 turned into 180 which was even more fun if not a bit rough and I rode into Bathurst at 7pm their time (forgot that atlantic time change) only to find no room at the in. It would seem the Acadian World Congress was in town and I’d landed smack dab in the middle of it. I found a room (the last one) in Caraquet at the Auberge de la Bai and paid handsomely for the privilege a good 60 km away which turned into an even longer ride as the RCMP has an incident on the road halfway there. So it was just after 9pm before I got off the bike. But hey, my room has a view. In fact it’s the view room. If I crick my neck and look around that bloody great bush that is.

8/11/2009

Maritimes, Trip Diary Aug. 11th/09

Filed under: — Steve Abbott @ 10:39 am

Finally got on the road today at 11am. The original 4am start was shot to hell by the fact I needed new tags for my bike’s plate. Went to the first automated kiosk only to have it die on the last step when I tried to pay. Another 10 minute bike ride later and I got them at the automated kiosk in Square One.

I went home to load the bike and ended up chasing off a squirrel trying to eat my tomatoes. A few minutes later, while putting my gear on the bike I had to chase off a couple of old JWs trying to eat my soul.

IMG_4502

I hit the road fully laden but still missing a couple of things, a sleeping bag, a sleeping pad and the power supply for my son’s netbook, that I liberated to store the detail of this trip on. Aaaargh! I’ll have to figure that one out later but I know it’s going to cost me.

The Loyalist Parkway was a pretty ride but not very technical. The short ferry ride was pretty cool as there’s always room for bikes on a ferry.

IMG_4506

IMG_4509

IMG_4513

I hit a wall of rain outside of Brockville. I should have known I was in for it as there was a funnel cloud forming to the North of the freeway. Ten seconds later I couldn’t see more than twenty feet in front of me and I was soaked through in seconds. But what can you do? You tough it out and push on. Ten long minutes later I came out the other side of the cell and about forty minutes later, I was mostly dry again. So when I spotted the second weather line it was easy math to pull into a rest area and get into the rain gear. Which I then wore all the way to and through Montreal. Which was a technical ride and still as gnarly as ever.


So now, I’m just outside St. Hyacynthe, leaving early tomorrow. New Brunswick, here I come.

8/3/2009

One Giant Baby Step

Filed under: — Steve Abbott @ 12:31 pm

cabot trail

So you’d think at this current juncture, a long motorcycle trip would be out of the question. In light of some new realities, it really isn’t. After some intense discussions with interested individuals this weekend and a long talk with my wife. It’s been decided that I should ride the route of our proposed first two episodes and do some pre-scouting of the route and locations. This will require a lot of riding just over 6500 kms. Oh I’m not following the exact route we’d take, I’m on a bit more of a personal journey and we’re not talking about some sort of touchy feelly voyage of self discovery. That ain’t me.

No I’m talking more about just riding around and seeing cool stuff. Stopping to snap a picture or seven and just going somewhere few people still do. Which is why I’m just doing two thirds of the Cabot Trail before I break off and circumnavigate the rest of Nova Scotia. It’s been a long time since I’ve been near the Atlantic and I’m looking forward to it.

Of course this trip is coming off on really short notice. I’ve got a few things to take care of here in town and my Mother is flying in for a brief visit on the 25th so I can hope for the stars to align and try to knock this off in the middle of the month or I wait till the first week of September and go better prepared but with a greater chance of bad weather. Not that this Summer has been any great shakes weather wise.

The pull of the journey is strong though. I will be keeping a detailed trip log and I’ll blog the lot when I get back.

It’s going to be an interesting ride.

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